I once spent building a spreadsheet that was technically perfect and practically useless. I was hiring a team for a high-stakes migration-the kind where every second of downtime costs more than the annual salary of the person clicking the button-and I wanted to be objective.
I created fourteen categories. I weighted them according to a proprietary formula I’d concocted in a fever of late-night self-importance. I gave “Strategic Vision” a 20% weight and “Technical Execution” a 15% weight.
The original procurement weights: prioritizing how a company talked about tools over how they used them.
I was so proud of my math that I didn’t notice I had prioritized how a company talked about their tools over how they actually used them. The agency that won the bid had the most beautiful slide deck I had ever seen. Their typography was flawless. Their “Strategic Vision” section was a masterclass in aspirational prose.
They failed the migration within the first because their lead developer had never actually touched the specific server environment we were using. I had bought a map from someone who had never walked the forest.
The Quiet Tragedy of the Matrix
This is the quiet tragedy of the procurement
